I am a lot of things. I am a daughter, cousin, friend, neighbor, wife, mother. I grew up in a single-parent household in a neighborhood. I was the only girl on my street and surrounding areas that could have been bad for me at the adolescence age. I didn’t grow up with a father or solid male role model that could have been bad for me. I graduated from a high school with a tough crowd. I went on to college. Started a great career in IT. Made more a year than I thought a black girl from the “hood” would ever make. Never had to depend on government assistance. I went on to get married. Move into my first how with my husband and I even have a 3-year-old son. The first nine sentences of this paragraph are more than enough to be anyone’s greatest achievement. Even after re-reading those sentences I should be grateful and feel accomplish but I didn’t
June 2016 my grandmother passed. I had never experienced a death that close to me. I had been to plenty funerals, but not for someone who played a major role in my life. She was my rock. In the years leading up to her death I got distracted with being a mom and driving 60 miles a day back and forth to work and we didn’t get the chance to talk as much as we did before, but in my heart, I know I made her happy. Some of her kids failed to think so, but they were never around. There were lots of conflict in the family to the point I only have my mom. I was never a fighter but I had to fight for my family, my freedom, and sanity. That right there made me more in tune with the person I was meant to be.
Once I learned how to fight I was no longer accepting just anything folks who said they love me were giving me. You had to start showing me with your actions and not just your words. I started to put myself first and be selfish with my actions. With the help of a dear friend who I almost lost a year after my grandmother, I had no choice but to be. I was self-destructing because I never took time to live my life for me so that I can be the best me for people who need me the most starting with my son. So that is my greatest achievement… So far. Realizing that I matter and that I am loved. Starting with myself.
I am enough,